practical hands-on training - learn by doing; plus, interacting with a variety of people
practice. connecting with fellow humans.
Meeting Michelle and her beautiful energy - and also the practice was invaluable -especially practicing introducing the circles - I got a lot from it.
Feedback from others in my group to myself and others
Challenges and feedback
Hearing from people of other places and cultures.
Learning about the three round five minute empathy sharing
The ability to practice facilitating an empathy circle
The Empathy Circle and the experience.
The facilitation modelled by Bill. A few times, Bill interjected with relevant feedback. I want to specifically call out his reminder that making the effort to listen is valuable in in itself, it isn't mandatory to repeat verbatim or register every single thing that is said. Importantly, his interjection made clear that as a facilitator, he had his finger on the pulse .
connection to people in the training
Learning how to respond to challenges in a timely and effective manner.
Wiliness to share
The empathy circle was very enlightening and moving. I appreciated it very much, and can clearly envision the value that a culture of empathy would bring to the world.
Getting constructive feedback.
I appreciated the constructive criticism given to certain members of the group, who broke out of the empathy circle structure.
Hearing what the other members of my had to say and how all of our stories ended up connecting.
participating in practical application of the process
when I was the facilitator
The dive-right-in approach. I was caught off guard by the process but that was precisely the right thing for me as a learner. It helped that I could compare facilitation styles with other learners, allowing for a 360 degree view of different challenges.
Learning that verbal or condescending cues are triggers for more aggression
none at at this time
Bill did not quite accurately address my question about is it ok to reflect feelings and not just words. His example, "sounds like you're having trouble in your marriage," is an evaluation, assessment, thought or opinion; it is not a reflection of feelings. If the speaker had said "my wife and I fought last night" while shedding tears, I might be inclined to reflect "you're so sad about fighting with your wife last night." This reflects more than the words the speaker spoke; it is reflecting his feelings. Is this ok?
how to make it safe when someone who is very traumatised begins sharing deep trauma very quickly in the circle - how to keep it safe for them and for the other participants who are not ready to cope with that level of intensity
How might I be using empathy circles in the future?
how to host one with only one facilitator?
I'm wondering how to be more in my heart space so that I can be a better listener without effort or trying using my brain.
1. Is there an ideal group size (both larger and smaller)? At what point does it become unwieldy/less effective?
2. Is there a significant difference between virtual and in-person Empathy Circles? I've only ever been part of virtual ones..
How will I handle distractions
What if active listener is making judgmental comments? What do I do as a facilitator?
I need to create more opportunities to practice facilitating empathy circles.
Can you give examples of empathy circles conducted in businesses (full profit businesses - not non-profit setup) ? What were the topics? and How did they go?
How many people would be the limit in an empathy circle?
How do we introduce or invite people to empathy circles
At what point to make an announcement and break the structure of the group, if things are getting too out of hand, or mixed up.
Nothing at this point
Will I be able to to have a silent moment instead of talking?
advanced training to become a facilitator and start my own circle
how do I get others interested
First of all, thank you for addressing each of my questions from last week in the session! :)
Q: The empathy circles that I have been part of generally take two hours overall (including introductions, check-out). Is it possible to hold a shorter yet equally effective session for people who are pressed for time? If so, what would the structure look like? Would it be the same as the regular one, compressed?
How do I balance enjoying facilitating with listening and time keeping
Resisting making suggestions or going into a counseling mode as been challenging :)
Someone falls asleep in the circle.
When a person is having a hard time being the active listener
Staying focussed for 2-1/2 hours with no break.
someone insulting the people
when active listener is speaking too much or when active listener is taking so many notes that it is distracting the listening process
Wearing many hats - time-keeping, listening, speaking, reflecting, ...
I thought it would just be technology but it was interpersonal communication
when active listener is making comments or body language that is showing an opinion or judgment of what the speaker said. It feels off....like not really listening because she/he is reacting to content.
I have a hard time setting a limit, if I believe it may hurt someone's feelings.
A mixture of nerves and vulnerability when sharing things that are important.
Repeating back what I heard.
Internet connections, I'm not sure if it's mine or others, but the hardest part is when it freezes when someone is speaking and you're trying to listen to them, but that's a hard problem to solve.
Being resilient after criticism
distractions - verbal, movement, participants have no video
Keeping an eye on the time while also listening/facilitating. The latter demands my whole attention and the former gnaws away at it. Graham described one solution in the last class - delegating that responsibility.
Trying to be at peace with challenges
What did you learn from the experience of facilitating an empathy circle?
none at this time.
I can't think of any now
Ask the following questions:
1- What should we start doing?
2- What should we stop doing?
3- What should we continue doing?
Nothing as of now.
What did you learn from this session?
What is one thing that you learned about yourself, which interferes with your capacity for empathy?
On a scale of 1 to 5 was your expectation meet. "yes- 5"
What personality changes do you imagine might come from frequent experience in empathy circles, such as the one you experienced today?
Which homework assignments of the empathy circles could we include?
I don't have one at the moment.
Nothing right now
-None for now-